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Writing

Daring to Say Yes: How I Came to Write My First (Published) Book

Melinda Tognini October 10, 2015 13 Comments
Many Heart, One Voice cover
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What have you dared to say yes to? And what was the outcome?

When I tell people that my first book is about to be published, the response is usually, Really? Is it a novel? I explain that while I do write fiction, I’ve spent the last eight years researching and writing about war widows. The next question is often about how I became involved in such a project. The short answer is that it kind of just happened. But there’s a more complex answer and it involves daring to say yes.

Documenting the story of the War Widows’ Guild in Western Australia was initiated in 2007, by Marjorie Le Souef (formerly Learmonth), who had been the inaugural state president of the organisation in 1947 until her remarriage later that year. Remarkably, Marjorie returned to the same position some 50 years later, after the death of her second husband. She believed it was important to tell the Guild’s history before it was too late, before the stories of these war widows were lost forever. And so she placed a small advertisement in the newsletter of a local writing organisation, the Katharine Susannah Prichard Writers’ Centre.

The seed for my involvement came about the same time, while I was frantically finalising my honours thesis. Although my focus was a series of short stories and an accompanying essay, I also completed a biography unit in which I wrote about a friend who’d lived through Pinochet’s military coup and dictatorship in Chile.

Her story is powerful and fascinating, and yet she’d never shared it before, primarily because of the culture of secrecy and fear she’d grown up with. Not only did she lack the confidence to tell it herself, she was utterly surprised to think that anyone else would find it remotely interesting.

I simply set out to tell her story, to convey the experiences of a teenage girl surviving a traumatic time in her country’s history, in the most vivid way I could. But what blew me away was her reaction to reading her experiences expressed through my words (many of which were actually her words, which I transcribed). It wasn’t just that she felt the narrative accurately conveyed what she went through. The entire  process seemed to bring with it a level of healing for her. At that stage, I’d never even heard of ‘writing as therapy’, so it certainly wasn’t something I consciously set out to do.

Her response welled up in me a passion to help others tell their story, particularly those I think of as ‘invisible stories’ – ones that have traditionally sidelined (or omitted altogether) in the dominant narratives of our country.

That’s why when a friend showed me the War Widows’ Guild’s ad for a writer, I dared to follow it up by submitting a resume and a sample of my writing. I was short-listed and attended an interview with the Guild’s executive committee, but self-doubt ruled me out of the running. Imagine my surprise when the Guild’s executive officer, Jenny Knight, phoned to say I was the one they wanted to take on the project.

I immediately said yes, then hung up the phone and wondered what I’d gotten myself into. I was excited about the possibility of writing the story of the Guild, of bringing the war widows’ stories to the centre of the narrative, but I also felt completely overwhelmed. I’d had a number of articles and personal essays published, and was about to submit my honours thesis, but this was a whole other level of research and commitment.

I still wonder whether I would have said yes if I’d known in advance the enormous task ahead of me and how long it would take to complete. We anticipated a two year time frame. In fact the publishing process has been almost that long, and the entire process has taken much longer (more about that in another post).

But I’m so glad I dared to say yes.

Many Hearts One Voice: the story of the War Widows' Guild in Western Australia

Over to You

When have you dared to say yes?

And if you’re writing something at the moment (whatever the genre or form), what was the seed for your project?

 

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Melinda Tognini

story-gatherer & mentor

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13 Comments

  1. Frances Macaulay Forde says:
    October 10, 2015 at 8:35 am

    So fearless. Congratulations and well done again, Melinda.

    Reply
    1. Melinda Tognini says:
      October 10, 2015 at 8:44 am

      Thanks, Frances – and I really appreciate your support. I’m not sure that I’m fearless; I felt terrified many times, wondering whether I had what it took to finish it, so I think it was more about somehow moving forward despite the fear!

      Reply
  2. Louise Allan says:
    October 10, 2015 at 9:26 am

    Inspiring stuff, Melinda! Good on you for having the courage to say, ‘Yes’. I’m glad it’s worked out!

    Reply
    1. Melinda Tognini says:
      October 10, 2015 at 9:29 am

      Thanks, Louise. I can tell you, there were numerous days when the self-doubt crept (or should I say thundered?) back in and I wondered whether it would (work out)!

      Reply
  3. Priscilla Francis says:
    October 10, 2015 at 3:18 pm

    This is so inspirational for an aspiring writer like me. I intend to say “yes” to everything that resonates and take the challenge. I hope to be just as strong and brave… and not give up. Thank you for this!!! 🙂

    Reply
    1. Melinda Tognini says:
      October 10, 2015 at 3:26 pm

      You are so welcome! I’m just glad you found it helpful. I think your word ‘resonates’is important, because the other part of it (and perhaps another post) is that for everything we say ‘yes’ to, we are saying ‘no’ to something else. I’ve had the situation where saying yes to one project meant losing time and focus on something else I was passionate about. And I think, too, that being strong and brave is not so much about being without fear, but acknowledging the fear and then getting on with it anyway. There were so many times with Many Hearts, One Voice that I wondered whether I had what it took, but then (after allowing myself a minor meltdown) I picked myself up and continued on. I look forward to hearing what upcoming projects you take on because they resonate with you.

      Reply
  4. Meg McKinlay says:
    October 12, 2015 at 10:26 am

    I love this, Melinda. I think there are so many ultimately satisfying things in life we wouldn’t say ‘yes’ to if we could take the full measure of the task up front; it’s often a blessing that we can’t see much more than the road just ahead. To paraphrase EL Doctorow, “…you can make the whole journey that way.”

    Reply
    1. Melinda Tognini says:
      October 12, 2015 at 1:09 pm

      Yes! I love the quote, although I had forgotten I’d heard it before. Thanks for reminding me of it.

      Reply
  5. Maureen Helen says:
    October 12, 2015 at 10:34 am

    Loved this post, Melinda. Saying ‘Yes!’ Is an empowering action, especially when one feels challenged and stretched by the new project. I hope I never lose the ability and willingness to respond positively. Thank you for reminding me.

    Reply
    1. Melinda Tognini says:
      October 12, 2015 at 1:13 pm

      So glad you enjoyed it, Maureen – did you have moments of feeling stretched and challenged by your book, even though it’s about your own life, rather than researching someone else’s? I’m guessing the challenges might be different, but challenges nevertheless. Congratulations, by the way, and I look forward to reading it when it comes out.

      Reply
      1. Maureen Helen says:
        October 12, 2015 at 2:16 pm

        Writing about my own life is very challenging, Melinda, because it also involves writing about other people whose lives touch mine. That takes courage. It is a different challenge to write honestly about one’s own failings and mistakes, but unless you write the truth there is no conflict and no story.

        Thank you for your kind wishes.

        Reply
        1. Melinda Tognini says:
          October 12, 2015 at 2:26 pm

          It sounds like we have both been challenged and stretched, although in quite different ways. I can certainly see that your book has taken a great deal of courage, both in revealing yourself and in writing about others. And you’re right, without the honesty, there is no conflict or story. I think that perhaps you have the seeds for a couple of blogs posts in your comments here …

          Reply
  6. Discarded Manuscripts, Diving In and Other News | Treefall Writing says:
    August 2, 2016 at 8:31 am

    […] I’ve mentioned in previous posts, I’ve been making a conscious decision to say yes, instead of shying away from the […]

    Reply

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